Friday, July 17, 2009

I am see

I am tagged…and that also with the “HONEST SCRAP” yay me :D :D …thanku sis Nazia for tagging me with this one…atleast it gives a security that my ramblings are read :D :D ….well let those comments flowing too…it make me blabber more…. :P

So this “honest Scrap” thingy requires that I gather you guys and start telling you one by one full TEN things about me…whether you know it or you don’t :P…but yes they have to be true…u see “honest” duhhh….and then I will choose any lucky TEN people among you and will tag you with the that you can go ahead with a free fokat ka blog post :D :D and torture your reader .. :D :D don’t forget to pass it on and let the honesty flowing….please do tell the person that they are tagged…else it ll stop the great vansh of Honest Scrap… :P Also put the above Pic on your post just for identity purpose…it dint carry a pic..when it came to me…so the great me designed it :) :)

So here I go.....

1. I totally Love Floaters…I mean they are the best innovation in footwear ever made…they are comfy, they carry a great look, their strap doesn go off when you are running behind a bus..and they don’t give you those skin-peeing shoe bites……they are just awesome…


And I hate all those who think floaters don’t go with Salwaar-Kameez…they totally go..and if u think otherwise…come down to Chennai and meet CA doing girls…you ll understand how fashionable they are ;)…I even can carry it with Abaya…I do also :P :P lol….

2. I am too sensitive….I get crying on small things…and I get too happy at doesn’t matter for me …how big or small it is….I think I let my emotions flow the way they want too…but I am trying to control my anger….So if you know me ..please don’t hurt me…you have no idea how deep will it be cutting me.

3. Having said that…I am really confident of myself…I think I am blessed..I mean everyone is..but Allah has always been kind to me ..For some or the other reason…I have been blessed with the best set of people in life helping me out from the worst set of situations….not only this..i have amazed myself a lot of times by my bold decision…and no boosting here..honestly..

4. I dress good when I am sick….i totally pamper my self when I am down…I eat chocolates…talk to old friends…find myself story books…indulge in makeup and all those girly stuff..i even wear those girly sandals which give me shoe-bites…just to look good….coz it makes me feel better and love myself more.

5. I always wanted to open a school for poor that they can get education….and Inshallah I will do it..i don’t want to be a teacher but I want to do this….there are so many who needs somebody….but we don’t lend a helping hand..i don’t know why…

6. I hate Pimples..everyone does..but I hate them most….i really walla hate them….imagine if it is only the skin colored face of yours to be seen….(in hijab) and the whole attention of the person before you is on your face….how crummy it will be if a red, ugly pimple pop out of your beautiful skin, laughing at you, mocking you and not willing to go….*nightmare*

7. I put emphasis on it a project…a presentation..a gift…even it is only to satisfy my hunger….a dress…or anything in world…everything should have that extra bit on that it satisfy my eyes….colors are exactly what I love…bright..fluorescent…or dark…doesn matter…the more the color the better it is for me…I believe the million colors of the world are merely not for us to differentiate stuffs but to enjoy and appreciate their beauty..

8. I have a little angel and devil combo in my house….my lil sis FIZA….I totally love her..not that I don’t love Zaid :D :D ….i ll give my life for him :) :)..but this small wonder has never left me wondering if all the brains in the world has been condensed and stuffed in her little skull….she is an Einstein…the cuter girly version of him….she is smart in all sense…akhir behen kiski hai ;) is she in my abaya and scarf…*I totally hate when someone touches my stuff but then this was willingly done*


9. I am sick at this time….i got cold…I totally mess up my self when I have cold…I don’t carry a hanky….am not used to it….but this cold make me do so…then this stupid cold gets fever following it and headache and then body ache…and then a D’Cold tablet :D :D

Actually I live on tablets…I ll always have Disprin and Pudeen hara with me….my life saving drugs…paracetamol at times makes way to my purse too.

A CUTIE DARLING - JUST ONE DAY OLD (My lovely frnd's lovely niece):)

10. I love babies and dream of having four..:D :D lol….i cant resist if I see a cute baby anywhere….at market place, home, workplace anywhere…if the baby is cute..everything else is off my attention list… I feel only babies are the most pure at heart and so are the most beautiful creature on earth.

Class over….Here’s the tag being passed on to the lucky 10

1. JaLpArI (Almas Aapi)
2. Sis Kakchik
3. Princess Nuchu
4. Sis Malizea à l'adresse
5. Sis Baran
6. Symphonic Discord (to all the gurls over there)
7. Saim
8. Arun
9. Chirag
10. Stephen

I tried cheating for this post by asking my friends to list down stuff for me… :D :D …but then I am hardly satisfied so I sat down writing stuff about myself…there is a lot of stuff I din’t say…ll say when I ll be tagged next time :P :D

Monday, July 13, 2009

How about a hearty laugh today ?

Now...its time for some ramblings (Dhir, according to The Free Dictionary it means "Lengthy and digressive", which i feel is the wrong definition; don't believe 'em they are free ;) :P )....

This weekend my mail box was full of surprises...umm lovin it....

am tagged...tagged..for teh second time...yuuuuuhooooooooo.....its THE "Honest Scrap" Award gifted by the lovely Sister Nazia...She has a really honest and outspoken blog out there...(which, by the way, may not interest all but is one of my fav)..more about this tag in the next post when i have enough time....

This post is dedicated to Vatsap and his master Caricature of mine... :D :D I rolled over's really PHUNNY...and ya i am still doubtful if it looks like me :-@'s funny..

Temme....if it looks like me any snese..except that dupattah on my head *those who have seen me* or if you are in a shock and ll neva eva want to meet me :( :( *those who are still awaiting their fortune to see me ;)*

In any case...your valuable and honest comments are welcome...

Get your own one done here and send em at my mail or upload it on your blog or courier to's upon you..but i really wanna see you all out there in colourful line drawing ;)

Thursday, July 9, 2009

If you are happy..CLAP YOUR HANDS :D

I am extreeeeeeaammlllllllyyyyy happy today..the extent of the word “extreme” can’t define my happiness...I don’t’ know if it’s a mood swing…I don’t care if it is one…it’s a refreshing change though..A welcome one…

After full one week of sheer depression and my negative side overpowering my positive one…it is really like the first rain in Chennai in this scorching heat….I was so into depression that I might have done something to myself…I was crying..and crying….and crying..and just wanted to go to Allah to find peace…

But I think instead of that…Allah chose to come to me …and that has resulted in this Happiness…

I really don’t know what’s the reason but I am happy..All day long I was happy…not even a single thought of depression..not a single reason of sadness touched me…It was all the happy, cheery merry vibes touching me …and I was so much into it…I am really loving it :)

I never wanted to write this here …but blog surely deserve it…I mean I tortured my colleagues, friends, mom..even Fizu with this sudden happiness and still I have so much left that I am passing it to my paradise…so that it can reach u all guys… :) :)

People get up from your comfy and not so comfy chairs and sing with me…

If you are happy and you know it


If you are happy and you know it


If you are happy and you know it then your face will surely show it

If you are happy and you know it


*claps claps* :D :D :D

I know ..kinda strange and sudden mood swing…but I just can’t tell you how welcomed it is…

So much that Li took videos of me cracking silliest joke on earth, jumping around in happiness and making weird faces…I even made the hutch dog one face ..*awwwwwwww choooo cute*..

Sangy and others were totally shocked..can’t say if the vibe touched them..they were shocked more than happy :D All those who spoke to me on phone or did chat with me (shanu, saim, angel..) all were shocked…and awesome-ly happy….

Yup AWESOME-LY is a word…as in Awesome-ly wonderful :)

I even told world about it ..

Not only this

I got to know that Brillianto and superbo are words too :D (Courtesy: Saim)

Mom is sick of me singing songs in the highest pitch I can, and jumping around like a rabbit :D …I even taught Fizu that when she make “zid” (that is if when she gets stubborn) regarding a specific thing..she should not only repeat it thrice but should also tap her feet on earth thrice :D :D like I was doing…

Mujhe purse chahiye

Mujhe purse chahiye

Mujhe purse chahiye

She repeated:

Mujhe top chahiye

Mujhe top chahiye

Mujhe top chahiye

(taps her feet as she says ) :D:D

See…she learns fast ..:D :D

Dad was wondering who is younger…19 year old me …or soon to be 8 year old she :D :D

Summary of the story is that I AM HAPPY
Let’s celebrate it with the lines which I wrote in one breath due to my excessive dose of happiness:

Come on baby

I have been waiting for you all my life

When I first took a breath

To the last minute, I will die

Come on Sweetheart

Escort me to the world unseen

A world of you and me

Where dreams are in
:D :D

Yay me :D :D

P.S. Thanks to all those who have been there with me last week....:)i could have not made it sans u all :)

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Stabbed in the Court of Justice

World is Bad. It’s the worst world ever. Kalyug for sure. And its hell bad for all those who want to live in peace. I can’t express my sorrow, anger, agitation and god knows what all over the recent incident where a girl was murdered in front of whole court for the simple reason that she demanded to practice her religion.

Hijab, a simple piece of cloth is becoming such a big issue..that my blog seems to be overdosed with by by one some retard will come out of his snake-hole finding all the world’s fault in that simple piece of cloth over an innocent girl’s head. This time I thought I ll blog in peace..not complaining..not finding faults with other but then peace is alien to this world and my blog is no exception to this.

Yes I am angry, very angry and the reason is the brutal murder of Dr. Marwa El Sherbiny (inna lillahe va inna elihe razeoon) now rightly called hijab martyr. She, 31, dragged Axel W in Germany to the court after he called her a terrorist and went on insulting her religion and tried taking her scarf off in public in a playground before her son, who was playing there.

How more insulting can it be, how more heartless and insane can it be. You call a random lady playing with her kid in the park, a terrorist just because she wears a scarf and try to take it off her head (shameless you!) and then dont stop your bl**dy tongue when insulting her religion.

After she won the proceeding in the court, Axel W, frustrated of being charged a fine of 750 Euros for insulting her, jumped off and stabbed her right there in the court before all the “thekedaars” of justice 18 times. I repeat she was stabbed 18 times and that also when she was 3 months pregnant with her second child.

His husband, Mr. Okaz tried to save her and was shot by the guard there in the court accidentally. Stupid guard. He is still struggling for life.

Axel, W, 28 was said to be driven by a deep hatred of foreigners and Muslims as per the German prosecutors. He is still on trial (lets see when it ends).

This is the stage we are in…what you call it Stone stage or BEAST stage. Human has turned into an animal, well by the English definition man is a social animal..only we need to remove the “social” attribute off this title.

I just pray that the killer is not let off on any grounds.

And I pray for peace for Mrs. Sherbiny and her family. According to the reports a vast majority of people in Egypt attended her funeral prayer along with Senior Egyptian officials and German diplomatic staff.

P.S. I am not blaming any particular community.
P.P.S. Picture taken from here/ and here.

Monday, July 6, 2009

Celebrating Six months of Hijab, Alhamdulillah :)

This is the time (belated) for my favorite topic and newest passion – My hijab. This is not the only thing which I love, possess, or respect but it’s the thing which gives me freedom, sets me carefree, and make me more confident. For people new or unaware with the word, “hijab” basically means a barrier or a veil but in today’s world it is often referred as the headscarf which Muslim girls wear. However it’s just not the scarf but the full set of modest clothing which should be counted under hijab –a long discussion postponed for later, InshaAllah.

But before that it’s time to celebrate. Alhamdulillah, by the Grace of Allah, I have successfully completed my six months of donning the hijab (on 1st July, 2009), :) :) :) in public, everywhere I go :) :) :). It has certainly been the toughest ordeal I have been in. How can a simple scarf or let’s say for that matter, wearing modest clothes be a problem with anyone? Certainly, it’s not a problem for the person wearing it, but surprisingly for the people around such person.

I have been wondering and still wonder why others have to be bothered about what you wear. If it was confined till this thinking also, it was well and good. But people go a step ahead when it is concerning other’s personal/religious matters. You ask if you want to know, you question if you have doubts, you advice if you think something is wrong. I am always more than happy to spread the beautiful logic behind it. But for God sake be away and shut your mouth if you are ignorant, media-fed, unrelated to me and still want to shower me with your “oh, dear why you have to wear it” advices.

I am an independent girl, born in a very liberal family, brought up in a mini-India kind of environment. I always enjoyed the freedom of wearing what I want, voicing my likes and dislikes, I have friends whom I like, I study what I want to, and none of the above choices is affected by parental or social pressure, because I was never into them. So telling me what I should and shouldn’t is the worst try you might be making. And so when you see me in hijab all of a sudden (that’s when you haven’t met me after 31st December, 2008) please refrain from any such advices or looks rather simply ask me the reason of me going hijab-ified :).

It seems like yesterday (lol, sounds like those cheesy flashbacks) when I first took hijab. No one inspired me , I am hardly surrounded by people wearing hijab, even not much in my family, back in village they do it more out of customs than logic and/or religion, in city I have seen only strangers in hijab. No one asked me or compelled me to it, I hardly have Muslim friends, and those selective ones are also very liberal when it comes to compulsion in religion (well they are supposed to…there is no compulsion in religion –Qur’an 2:256). I dint read anything, normally I read a lot, but never it have been on religion.

Given all these facts it seems impossible as how I may be into it, not to mention the way I was before. I wasn’t blind about fashion, I was modest then also (modest as in Indian parents sense ;) ), used to dress good, no revealing clothes, no excessive jewelry. But I was in, in all sense. I was certainly into looking good, I always wanted my hair to be open, flowy and combed. Makeup which will make my color of a lighter tone or will let my features enhanced was always welcome. I avoided meetings after day long of work. So much it was there that I was pointed by my childhood friend that I keep a lot of note of presentation.

But suddenly on the morning of 29th December, Monday I woke up early at 8 (ya that’s early for me, even on a working day :D ) and decided that I will wear hijab. I was not sure why, was not sure from when and certainly not about the degree I was going to cover myself. The only thing I can remember is reading the following verses of Qur’an randomly on net a few days back, not exactly sure when:
Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty: that will make for greater purity for them: And Allah is well acquainted with all that they do. (Qur’an 24:30)

And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that they should not display their beauty and ornaments except what (must ordinarily) appear thereof; that they should draw their veils over their bosoms and not display their beauty except to their husbands, their fathers..(a list of exceptions)..and that they should not strike their feet in order to draw attention to their hidden ornaments. And O ye Believers! turn ye all together towards Allah, that ye may attain Bliss. (Qur’an 24:31)

The feeling of going for hijab was so strong in me that I started searching stuff on hijab online, the logic behind it, the Islamic reason, practicality of it in today’s world, the problem faced, the solutions therein and everything starting and ending on hijab; then and there itself. I was afraid but confident in a way which I can’t explain. I was going under a mix of emotions and my mind and heart were battling on something which I wasn’t so sure of. I even felt that those 3 days (29th December – 31st December, 2008) me was not me at all, it was some super-natural force which was there, an inspiration within.

I was certainly not brainwashed, how I can be by these simple two verses of the Qur’an, given I never mentioned and asked anyone about hijab before. Those 3 days was a test for me, I knew not the path I was going to follow but I was somehow sure it was right because it’s in the BOOK. I am a Muslim, always was (I believe everything on earth is Muslim by nature, again a long discussion), believed in one God, Qur’an and the Sunnah of Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessing be upon him); knew about hijab from birth, knew these verses long back, knew the meaning also, but it never clicked me, it never made me think the way I was thinking those three days.

All I can remember is that I mentioned it to some of my closest friends, happen to be non-Muslim and hid it from my parents, Muslim. I know an unexplainable thing but that what I did. I was afraid that my parent will think that I am under someone’s influence, I was afraid that I won’t be able to explain the strong desire and force in me guiding towards hijab. It’s not like they dint wanted me to do it but for sure it would have been more of a shock than pleasant surprise for them. To my luck and by the Grace of God my friends were with me. They supported and encouraged me towards it. Lian, Jaimy, Sangy, Dhir, Shanu I will be always grateful to you guys and words may not explain it. We shopped for full sleeves dresses, abayas and hijab together and the experiences were unique in themselves. Of course not knowing what you want and asking for the same has to be unique. One such memorable thing is the Nisha Model we saw in hijab, in nearly every shop we went and how it became a joke between us.

The real drama started from 1st when I wore it. I told my parents the night before, surprisingly, dad was more cool and believed me and once again trusted me with my freedom, but mom, like always, was a bit worried though a lot happy and proud. :) I felt for the first time I did something extra-ordinary, unexpected but desired by both of them.

When I was seen with hijab obviously a lot of eyebrows were raised, some had the guts to ask, and the others went overboard by their not-so-welcome comments. I was always more than happy to explain that hijab is not subjection, it’s a modest way of dressing, it is prescribed by Allah for both men and women, it is not cultural, it’s the same all over the world, because its Islamic, it’s to keep away the unwanted attention, my mind conveys better than my body, it’s by my will I am wearing it and I was ignorant all these days not to wear it. This should have answered the unending queries, but Alas! Man is never satisfied.

I was handed over a bunch of advices and comments that just made me laugh or look at the person from tip to toe in order to ensure myself if I was speaking to a sane human being only. Strange it may seem, but educated people handed me advices like,

· You are not getting married, are you? Then why wearing it, enjoy your days.

· Are you leaving your studies?

· Do you know that it has reduced your beauty by 60%

· You will leave it; it’s just so not practical.

· Do you have a boyfriend; did he ask you to wear it?

· You parent’s forced you into this, all Muslim parents do that.

· There are people who appear religious but are corrupt inside.

No, I am not getting married, not leaving my studies and certainly not forced into this. I am still enjoying my days and enjoying them better than before, it all depends upon your definition of enjoying. I still dress good but for myself, not for others. I don’t care how much it has reduced my beauty, I am still beautiful, like every other human being, I am beautiful to my parents, to my friends and this all is what matters. Beauty is of mind, of character, not of face, skin color or for body shape. My beauty in its full sense is not for strangers to enjoy. My boyfriend? Oh crap, do you think I will stick to the guy who won’t let me wear what I want to. And how I am inside has nothing to do with how I appear outside. If I don’t appear religious will it make me less corrupt (if at all I am so).

And in all sense it’s practical, I am studying, working and doing every normal thing from past 6 months and it has been practical WITH THE HIJAB. So in short I am an educated, free, independent, modern muslimah proudly wearing my hijab by my will. That’s the reason for this celebration.

Many things happened in past six months but nothing led me to leave my hijab , Alhamdulilalh, I am very short tempered but the confidence and joy of wearing it let me handle every unpleasant remark (like above) with patience and understanding. Hijab has not been just the head covering for me, it is now my identity, it is what made me spiritual by all means, it is what let me understand Islam in its true sense and also it is the thing which let me differentiate between people and their reason of inclination towards me, I did gain a lot of encouragement and a thumbs up but at the same time I have lost friends too. But I believe that it has happened for the good and InshaAllah will continue to happen so. :)

Talking about celebrations, here is one more thing to celebrate; Mc Donalds have finally opened in Chennai. Hers the first (busy) day pic of it, to eat on time you certainly have to wait for 2 hours in the queue. :D

P.S. All the pics, except for the last one are taken from google images.
P.P.S. I was supposed to post this on 1st july, itself but was unable to do so because of reasons uncountable.
P.P.P.S. I am feeling blue from one week, here publicly i say sorry to those who are hurt because of me, this guilt is not going to leave me, i cant mend things but certainly i am sorry. :( I hope things turn better. :(