A Happily Ever After

If wishes were horses, 

And fairy tales were true, 

Would you be mine 

And I be with you?

I would dress in rags, 

And have no shoes, 

I would endure wrath, 

Of ugly sisters too.

I would have poisoned apple, 

And trade woods for kingdom, 

I would wait for a magical kiss, 

And sleep till then.

I would love a beast, 

And wouldn't be concerned. 

I would kiss a frog, 

And patiently wait for it to turn.

If wishes were horses, 

And Fairy tales were true, 

I would face everything 

For a Happily Ever After with you.

The Law of Procrastination

So it’s been like a week since I am thinking of writing a post on my blog…you know just to make sure that this place doesn’t die out like all my other interests…seriously...I am something like the most promising procrastinator.."no matter what I start..from where I start..I am bound to leave it halfway without completing the same until and unless an external force (read : life and death situation) is applied therein"..and also coz I had nothing to talk about..anyways coming back to the topic (which I just accidentally chose)..The Law of Procrastination.


This law of procrastination applies rather has continued to be applicable on all the things I have ever touched from the day of my arrival on this once beautiful earth..i learned to walk when I was of some 15 months (that’s late as per my mom’s standard) and spoke a proper sentence when I was nearing the age of two..though I never stopped after that..


I believe the reason I skipped my LKG and UKG was because of my adherence to this law subconsciously.. needless to say that I was always the last person to do assignments and studied the night before the exam (still do)..


Once I was left on my own I was the last to reach for the bus and so was mostly recognized as the-girl-who-makes-the-conductor-grumble-early-morning or simply the-girl-who-runs-behind-the-bus-till-school-gate.. And now when I have a little extra pocket money and literally no time on hand to spend, I just catch an auto to work and end up paying the auto wala munh maangi keemat on the face of non-working-chennai-auto-meters.. later on that..


Now when I am thinking of it I think I joined CA under the effects of the same law…I was too lazy to read all those college brochures, or attend some career counseling sessions or go through those painfully simple looking sites that I took whatever came on my way.. partially because of this and partially because now its easier to say that I was not the one who chose this for me.. Notwithstanding however absurd or stupid it may sound..


Moving on..fast forward skipping the most cruel 3 years of articleship one can imagine to undergo…present day…shucks I have an audit report to complete..and I can’t start it..not even think of starting it…simply because FIRST its all a long repetitive work and the more the work gives me the feeling of déjà vu..the more I postpone it..

SECOND no matter however lazy I may be..I have a distinct style of my own..you guessed it right, just like everyone else.. and am simply not a Ctrl+X Ctrl+Y Ctrl+V person.. (are the shortcuts correct?? I am so a right click person) so much that even if you show me an answer in the exam hall I won’t copy it..khuddari you know (and also because I don’t trust your geniuses) ..so I guess it’s going to lie there all neat, clean and untouched till my boss is back…or till we lose the client.. Whatever happens earlier..All thanks to the law of procrastination which hangs to my neck like an Albatross..



One may think how the law only applies to the field of academics.. Absolute nonsense unlike all other hyped laws this one is fully completely universal..and applies to every individual with a variance of ±5 on all life’s situation.. for example I eat my lunch only at 4 and sleep till 12..a.m /p.m doesn’t matter..and am not just talking about Sundays.. don’t ask me how.. and I am always the last person to reach a gathering… the more important it is the more late I will be.. People often show me a face for it while I shamelessly recite the song “Main der karta nahi der ho jaati hai” (ironically from the film Heena)..


You see my friends, unlike those lucky believers of astrology, I have only the law to blame.. and this was a small account on how the Law of Procrastination governs one’s life..For more such nonsense by-heart my blog address..




**Breaking News : Sources has revealed that deeper researches suggest that those 2% people who clear their CA in one go may be considered exempt from any said effects of this law..you see its not for the hardworkers..it’s for the smart ones.. someone who dare to manage a lifetime’s work in a few hours ..often in seconds..if its dressing up for a movie..

Why-O-Why Dear Lions!

There was a sign at Anna Zoological Park on some Chimp's prison...

Imagine Yourself at their place.
DON'T TEASE ANIMALS

..followed by a pic of a man inside that cage and animals teasing him from outside. Well we happened to be in a similar situation...not in the prison...but in a bus well protected by net made of wires..when we went out for Lion Safari in the same Zoological Park.

Now everyone knows how kids are excited to see animals...(fine i get it that i am 19, but i ll always be a kid at heart)..they scream, they make noises...they point fingers...and they try to talk in animal's lingo also...

And guess what happened when we were in the bus..AND THE LIONS OUT..ALL FIVE OR SIX OF THEM..MOVING AROUND...

Guess...

well...they were just NOT INTERESTED in us ..huh!

They didn't roar, not even a squeal... people on the bus cried theirs lung out...screaming at them and roaring at them as if teaching a baby how to speak..and the lions...they got up and moved to a different place..some lazy ones just looked up to us and then back to the ground.

Why-o-why Dear Lions have to break Little Gul's heart :( Insaan to insaan ab to jaanwar bhi unreliable rehgaye...dil k armaan aansuo.n me beh gaye. :(

Ye aankhen utha k zara dekh to lete :(

The white tiger though was a little upset from me...and roared while walking here and there...and little me loved it.. :)



P.S.

1. It's supposed to be my 50th post and i dedicate it to Lions, Animals, Lovely and Amazing ME to our National Animal...the TIGER..(i know white tiger is not the one..but hey it might be our Tiger's brother and also he roared at me :D lols. ) because like our National Game, which i so loved watching :( our National Animal too need us...with only 1411 left of them.

2. I know I am sounding insane...i a m a l i t t l e t o r n a p a r t...ll be back with some better stuff when iamalltogether.. [ yup! this is abridged from somewhere i don't care to remember ;) ].

Adios!

IT Dept says : It’s OK to forget your Father’s name

.
Office is fun. You gotta admit that. We are some sort of Chartered Accountants and because our government is trying hard to be widely branded as tech savvy or at least catch-up with the bird called Internet (of which they have absolutely no idea!), they require us to file some qualifying asessees' returns online. And for all this info (which just passed over your head) we require the EXACT name written on the PAN Application form (submitted ages ago) and because all our client hate keeping records, we end up calling the Income Tax Department every time.

IT Dept. is one step ahead of us. They will only speak to the Asessee (as if all rich people are literate and they will understand this long process and agree to talk to IT Dept!) and not to the agents or any associates.

We are the sandwiched species. If we can’t get the EXACT name submitted ages ago, boss will kill us, and IT dept. will no ways give us the name for they are partners in our tortures :(. We the enlightened (not to forget sandwiched) species devised a new way in all this tension, for necessity is the mother of innovation.



We made one of our colleague to speak to those extra cautious IT People as a 58 year old un-concerned Client named Abubacker...What happened after that is the history you ought to know:

Colleague: Hello Sir, I want My PAN Details as submitted in the beginning to file my returns online.

IT Dept.: Your name Sir

Colleague: (In his young 20 year old voice, calling the 58 year old guy's name) Abubacker.

IT Dept.: (On checking records and discovering an astonishing fact) You are 58 year old Sir?

Colleague: Yes Sir! (Making his voice a little coarse) Now may I have my PAN Details?

IT Dept.: One Minute Sir.(Confused) May I know your father’s name?

Colleague is now stunned, looking at everyone and suddenly realizing he doesn’t know his (Or Abubacker’s) father’s name..He motions to others and all are searching for the file for good 20 minutes)

Colleague: (To break the silence on the phone) One second sir..just a minute..

And then a sigh of relief...We got the file and the exact paper which has Abubacker’s name.

Colleague: (Struggling to read the name) its..Aa - Aa - M - I - R..Its “Aamir” sir.

And the conversation goes on for another fifteen minutes for which colleague ends up flipping every single paper in the file. But somehow the Chartered Accountancy student succeeds in making a fool of that paid Sherlock Holmes of IT Dept. and get the exact PAN Details (even when he forgets his father's name).

Moral of the story: It’s OK to forget your Father’s name. :D